|
Castration is not
right for everyone. In fact, it is proper for only a very small
percentage of the total population. The vast majority of men are happy with
their genitals and the male hormones in their body, and most would indeed
become anxious if anyone ever suggested the removal of their testicles.
Many men would feel suicidal if anything ever happened to their penis or
testicles.
For the tiny minority of people who truly desire orchiectomy and would
benefit from it, there are several reasons why they would do this. I
and some others who seek castration are not really men at all and have the
feelings that we are women inside. Others are men who seek relief from
powerful male sex drives that have seemed to run their lives out of
control. Less often there is the man who cannot otherwise find
relief from testicular pain, or a person seeking castration for religious
reasons.
So why did Sherry
seek castration?
Both the male sex drive and the hormones that feuled that sex drive
contradicted my inner sense of self. Not only did I dislike the
physical effects of testosterone, such as facial hair, body hair, and lowered
voice, but the mental effects of male hormones also bothered me. I did
not at all appreciate the male sex drive that nature had provided me, and as
I grew older I seemed more prone to anger and feeling irritated, while
testosterone seemed to dull my feelings and emotions overall.
I had learned in my high school biology class about the function of testicles
and ovaries. If only I could somehow remove or shut down those
testicles. Females have their reproductive systems inside their bodies
while males have theirs outside, and I felt very uncomfortable about having
mine outside. But testicles can't be converted to ovaries, so the only
solution is to cut them off.
My sex drive was actually no worse than average, and probably a little less
than average. I felt the first traces of libido when I was 13, but it
seemed to remain mild compared to my peers. I had my first nocturnal
emmision at age 15, but I did not have any voluntary orgasms until I was
20. Still, I did not like what libido I did have, and felt that I was
fortunate to not be driven as much as my male classmates. I could never
understand why the boys in my high school seemed so proud of a sexuality that
I despised. One evening I got caught outside in a thunderstorm while
delivering fliers for an auto mechanic, and I wished that one of the
lightning bolts would hit me between the legs and destroy everything that I
had there.
My libido did increase some around age 20. By that time I was
often thinking about somehow getting rid of my male genitals and ways I might
accomplish that. Sometimes I would think about slicing them off at
home. But anyone who performs a do-it-youself castration or penectomy
will likely bleed to death or suffer serious infection. If you would
truly be happier without testosterone, please have a doctor safely remove
your testicles.
Around Christmas of 1996 I suffered a painful sinus infection which seemed to
take all of my energy and knocked out my libido for a time. Though I
felt so miserable about the infection, I did like the impotence. After
I cleared the infection with antibiotics my libido returned, much to my
disappointment. But it did not return completely. My libido
remained reduced through 1997 and I noted that the less sex drive I had, the
better I felt about myself. Was there any way to be impotent without
being ill? Maybe my libido was finally starting to decline with age,
and I wondered if I could somehow speed up the decline.
My libido finally returned to its former level in 1998, and that really
disappointed me. Would it ever fade away? I obtained my online
connection in September, and then my gender issues surfaced in
November. I suddenly realized that maybe I could find a castration
doctor on the internet, and I soon found Dr. Spector's website.
Doctor Spector performed my orchiectomy on April 13, 1999 when I was 31 years
old and caused one of my dreams to come true. In just a matter of days
my libido faded to only a fraction of what it was. Prior to castration
I masturbated once daily, sometimes twice, and I was able to stop altogether
after castration. At the same time I was overtaken by a constant
serenity, and things seemed to not irritate me as easily. While I
haven't yet put the proper female hormones in my body, I have at least
eliminated the improper male hormones.
As a person who wishes for a female body, I also needed the assurance that my
body would not become any more masculine while I saved up the funds that I
needed for electrolysis and other transformation costs. Meanwhile I
enjoy the benefits of a much weaker and controlled libido while feeling more
calm all the time.
Why do some non
transgendered males want to be castrated?
EXCESSIVE LIBIDO - Some men as well as some transgendered persons seek relief
from an out of control libido. Castration often has dramatic effects on
the male sex drive, particularly if the person does not take any hormone
replacement afterwards. I've heard of men masturbating four or five
times daily before castration to a couple of times per month after the
surgery. Some men have gone from wanting too much sex for their wives
to not wanting it often enough. Sometimes a eunuch will take enough
testosterone after their surgery to maintain a moderate amount of sexuality.
CHRONIC TESTICLE PAINS - I hear many men suffering from this complain that
their doctors just don't understand their affliction. Some men have
obtained relief from castration, but then they have to accept all of the
other effects of castration such as impotence, infertility, loss of energy,
and loss of strength. I sympathize with those who face the difficult
choice of dealing with testicular pain or accepting the results of castration
in exchange for relief from this pain.
RELIGION - Some persons believe that castration will bring them to their god,
or that their god might even demand it. The person must ask themselves
if they will really be content with their religion for the rest of their
lives, because people have departed from religions but you can't change your
mind about having been castrated.
I myself once believed that I was supposed to remain and act male for my
religion, but I found no happiness in my beliefs and I was even thinking
about how I might kill myself. After I gave up practicing my religion,
I had to deal with additional years of masculinization which I had allowed in
the name of god. Please be very careful about what you do (or refuse to
do) with your body for any belief system, because regardless of your beliefs
and whether or not you change your beliefs, you will have to live with the
consequences of whatever you do with your body.
CASTRATION AND MUTILATION FETISHES - Some men feel sexually aroused by the
thought of castration, penectomy, or other mutilation. Unfortunately
the reality of castration eliminates the erotic fantasy of it, and it is
probably best that this remain a fantasy.
Too often a person with this fantasy either goes through with the reality, or
unintentionally gets castrated in an S/M scene. In a matter of days or
even hours the sex drive fades to almost nothing and the new eunuch finds
that they can no longer enjoy their fantasy which has now become
reality. Strength and energy decrease, and the eunuch feels devastated
as he feels that he has lost his manhood and realizes that he is forever
infertile.
Some regretful eunuchs take testosterone replacement, but many find that it's
just not the same as being on their own natural hormones. Libido may
remain low in spite of the shots, while some eunuchs can't maintain steady
hormone levels with the shots and suffer from mood swings. Testosterone
replacement is unsatisfactory for some, and I know of a few eunuchs online
who refuse hormone replacement even though they regret their
castration. Once you go through with orchiectomy, you will never be the
same again.
A small percentage of persons with a castration fetish turn out to be happier
as a eunuch. But castration must be approached with extreme caution,
and you must be absolutely certain that you really want the effects.
NULLIFICATION - There is a small percentage of the male population which is
not transgendered at all, yet they do seek to have their entire male genitals
removed. As there are transgenderists who are happy living as women
without the sex reassignment surgery, there are also a few men who are
happier without a penis. These men are different from those who merely
have a castration fetish.
While transsexuals often accuse these men of 'playing transsexual', most men
seeking nullification do not consider themselves transsexual or
transgendered, and many in fact despise being labeled such. Less often
someone will try to convince these men that they are transsexuals in
denial. While I really don't understand these men I do believe that a
few persons are indeed happier with having no genitals and should be respected
for their unique feelings and desires without being compelled to identify
with any particular group. Not everyone will feel the same or seek the
same goals as you or I.
MISCELLANEOUS - Castration is certainly not the solution for problems such as
male pattern baldness or men seeking infertility, because it has so many
other effects. There are drugs which can arrest baldness and birth
control can be had by vasectomy which will not affect hormone levels (yes,
I've seen one person seeking castration merely for birth control and balding
men asking about castration). If you are happy being a male and like
your sex drive and energy, then castration is not for you.
|
|
